Unmotivational Cat Pictures

cat

Someone once told me that I have a gift for expressing my feelings through animal pictures.

I believe them.

Today this cat represents me. It would be even more accurate if this cat were wearing ramen-stained sweat pants and oversized glasses.

I’m overwhelmed, I have a huge to-do list, and yet, the only thing I want to do is play Fez and/or quit school altogether and travel the world. My motivation level is officially at -200.

Screen Shot 2014-04-05 at 10.34.30 PM

My sweet husband even tried to coach me in a de-stress activity:

3-2-1

1-2-3

What the heck, is bothering me. 

Sadly, it did not work, but he was successful in making me laugh.

 So now, I must take things into my own hands.

  1. Peel myself off the couch.
  2. Drive to the nearest store & purchase coffee.
  3. Attempt to Force myself to disconnect from social media.
  4. Kick this Unit Plan’s butt.

(Haha “butt.”)

It doesn’t matter how overwhelmed I currently feel, because eventually, most likely at the very last minute (a.k.a. 2 a.m. Tuesday morning), everything on my to-do list will be accomplished…one way or another. Not because I am motivated, but simply because it needs to be done.

I can’t help but wonder why I find myself in this motivational rut every. single. semester. You would think that after almost six years, I would have this college thing down to a science. But, alas, I don’t. A part of me doesn’t really care anymore, and at the same time, a part of me cares too much. I care too much to actually say, “I give up.” So I trudge along, and wait for the next semester of classes, and try my best to maintain a 4.0.

I think back to my very first semester of college when I didn’t care at all. I thought I knew everything, and I drank too many energy drinks, and ate too many burgers from McDonald’s. I failed a music history class, and I only thought about this one boy who knew how to woo me with Switchfoot songs, and in the end, only disappointed myself.

Since then, I have had a great fear of failure, and of slipping back into my old apathetic ways.

I worry myself when I have days like today.

  Days like today make me worry that I won’t have a high enough GPA for those special golden graduation cords, and every picture meant for pride will only remind me that I could have worked just a little bit harder.

And then I take a deep breath, and drink a cup of coffee with Girl Scout Cookie creamer, and I remember that one school year of failure and self-disappointment does not define who I am today, on April 5, 2014.

I took a year off from college, and after that year was over actually went back, which I’ve heard is a pretty big feat. I’ve shown myself that I can be academically successful, and I was strong enough to let go of that Switchfoot singing boy for someone who suits me just a little bit better.

I need to remember these things, because if I constantly dwell on my failures, I will eventually become one.

For now, I will continue to remind myself that the semester is coming to an end very soon. (Oh, God. Help me.)

I will not dwell on the past. I will do my best. I will make it.

 And I won’t always feel like this cat, falling off the table.

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5 thoughts on “Unmotivational Cat Pictures

    • Thank you, my dear! The end of this annoying journey is so close, I can taste it! I appreciate you & your prayers so very much. ❤

  1. This blog made me laugh because of what I JUST wrote about you in my essay to VFCC!! HAHA OH KELLY!! Don’t put so much pressure on yourself. You are doing a GREAT job and you are almost done. The finish line is in site!! Press on.

  2. HAHA DAD. You make me laugh. No babies yet, please. And housework? What’s that?

    Mom – haha I know! How ironic… Thank you for the encouragement! I can’t wait to see you guys soon. 🙂

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